It’s not your fault you’ve not written your book

by | Oct 29, 2024 | blogging, creativity, writing | 0 comments

Oh October. You sly, sneaky little month. Just hanging out like “nothing to see here, it’s just me. Just your friend October.”

We’re in between the extremes: not quite summer in the southern hemi, not quite winter in the north. Just an in between sort of vibe.

And then BAM!

It’s the end of the month, it’s only eight weekends until Christmas and we’re staring down the barrel of the end of the year. If this has snuck up on you, I offer a resounding ME TOO! I put my head down to get some stuff done (gardening, daydreaming) and now this.

Before we dive headfirst into the melee of the end of year rush, I have a question for you:

Did you think you’d have your book written and/or published by now?

Before you cringe and run away or stress-eat your feelings, this isn’t one of the usual articles that will make you feel bad so you go and do the thing. (Yes, I can probably help and you can go take a look at my website to find out how or just ask, you know the drill).

Ok. Now you know that bit, let’s get on with it.

It’s really tempting to get triggered into disappointment with yourself and be despondent if your answer to the question above is no. But I’d like to invite you to stop a moment before you dive into the vat of self-flagellation and negative self-talk and start splashing around.

The most important thing to note here is:

It’s not your fault you’ve not gotten it done. (Read that again. I’m also going to repeat this over and over throughout this article so it sinks in. It’s that important.)

What if I told you that the real reasons you’ve not written your book are patriarchy and capitalism?

We live under these systems that demand work of us, perpetually.

24/7 availability, non-stop, shop-til-you-drop, on-demand all the damned time.

We’ve also been conditioned into a hyper-individualistic belief system that tells us that it’s our own fault if our lives aren’t ideal/we haven’t achieved certain things.

This is just not true. It’s like the absolutely heinous brainwashing of us all that the climate crisis is our own individual fault rather than the fault of the massive corporations whose Co2 emissions far exceed any of our own. (And who need to be held to account to fix the crisis because no matter how many lights we turn off or cartons we recycle, they will NEVER amount to an Exxon or Shell or BHP climate change mitigation action.)

It’s not your fault you’ve not written your book yet.

Another thing connected to these systems that you need to factor in the cost of living crisis that we’re experiencing globally. Prices for everything are jacking up and up and up. And whatever other demands and commitments you have in your life pile on top of that too. Being a human existing in late-stage capitalism has realities that we need to acknowledge as real stressors before we begin to berate ourselves about our lack of achievements outside continuing to exist.

Giving time to a creative endeavour like writing takes energy and headspace. There’s reportedly been not a lot of those to go around when I talk to my clients, group members and friends.

Life continues apace, and it’s faster and more overwhelming now for all of us. When we’re in a state of continual stress, it’s not possible to create with any regularity.

It’s not your fault if you’ve not written your book yet.

This doesn’t mean that no-one writes or creates, we know that. Of course things get written, created, crafted and published. It’s just that the board is stacked against (unpaid) creativity most of the time.

Why am I so very attached to making this more known?

Because so many of us beat ourselves up and blame ourselves for not finishing our book writing or other creative projects. When in reality it takes a lot of privilege to spend time on creative pursuits in a society that’s not set up for valuing them.

Having the time, space and energy to write requires that we’re not exhausted from everything else that living in this time and place needs from us. Given it’s a feature of most of our lives that we’re working, side-hustling, taking care of our responsibilities on every level, doing the self-care we can fit in, worrying about our list of things that need worrying about and trying to keep up with our life admin, there’s not even time for adequate sleep for optimal function, let alone creativity.

If it’s not your fault you’ve not written your book yet, what can you do about it?

The thing is, while it’s not your fault you’ve not written your book yet, the terrific news is that once you’ve seen what patriarchy and capitalism do to your creativity you can choose to rebel. You can do this gently, too, with less stress rather than more.

If you’ve been following along with my own writing and social media posts anytime lately, you’ll know I’ve been talking about gentle rebellion. I’m encouraging you to make a conscious choice to step away from the demands of patriarchy and capitalism for a small slice of time. You can give patriarchy and capitalism the finger for ten minutes, twenty minutes or an illicit-feeling hour, and just create whatever you’re creating.

Will it feel weird? Yes. That’s also a product of patriarchy and capitalism, and the subject of another upcoming article, I promise.

Will it be crap?

Probably.

Maybe, maybe not.

But what if it is?

Let it be crap. Let it be rough and a draft and feel silly or clumsy. Knowing it’s like this and doing it anyway? That’s also a rebellion.

The point is to step outside the systems and allow ourselves the time to create, even if it’s ten minutes. It’s an activism and a stand you can take without having to leave home or go to a rally. There’s no commitment apart from your stepping-out and creating something.

If you know you need to do this to save your own sanity and soul, then I’m inviting you to join my group mentoring program. It’s a monthly membership that’s a gathering-place, community, cheer squad, accountability container and learning space. Somewhere that creative work and writing your book are taken seriously but held lightly. Where the understanding of a group of people also working on their heart-led projects makes the work better just by being there.

It’s an inclusive, safe space for you if you’re:

  • Sick of spending your years yearning to write that book or get that creative project off the ground but never getting time to do it,
  • Sitting on your book idea – STILL, after years or maybe even decades,
  • Desperate to somehow, someway carve out time for you in the bustle of busyness that you currently live

The group is called The Gentle Rebels Club, and it’s a place where you focus on your writing. No distractions, no shoulds. Just you and your creative work. A weekly call time to work alongside others who are also working on their projects.

I’d love to welcome you in so you can finally deal with the underlying reason(s) you’ve not written your book yet and get it underway. Click here for more information on The Gentle Rebels Club: book writing + creativity for the too-busy.

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